drag time

this has been a miserably boring day.  it didn't have to be, but it was, and maybe that's for the best right now.

i can only say this.  i am grateful to have a place where i can be this lethargic and unmotivated.  i know that is not guaranteed and will, in fact, be changing soon.  but at this moment, i have shelter, i have food and water, and i have utilities.  that is good enough.

i didn't go to the gym today.  i prayed, i took meds and insulin.  i ate, but i also kind of grazed lightly through the day.  i talked briefly with Rachel and Lonnie, with my dad.  i heard from my mom late in the day.  i did nothing.  worked on nothing.  thought about everything.  in the end, i just sat still, because i didn't want to try to make a pocket full of change spend like a million bucks.

funny.  at the meeting yesterday, i told AG that i was broke, and then i talked my way backwards out of that situation.  i knew she would have given me some money, but i didn't want to continue that kind of thing.  she's a good friend.  you don't manipulate good friends.

i'm about to go to sleep.  counseling tomorrow.  guess i'll know what i'm supposed to know when tomorrow gets here.  i am appreciative of having life.  there are so many who are not so blessed at this moment.  Thank you, Father.