Push.

it is time.

i started this day still in my head.  i'm there a lot, lately.
i should have went to the Kingdom Hall but i didn't.  i found out my mom wasn't going and i went to bed.
i should have read my bible, my meditation books, but i didn't.  i was feeling pensive, lost in my own mind.
i thought about directions i should be wandering in, things i should be looking to see...
but all i did was doze.  until it was time for my meeting.
they guy that was supposed to chair today didn't show up.  made a big to do about chairing this month, making sure everyone knew he was going to.  then he didn't show.
saw the girl who is supposed to chair wednesday's meeting as well, at Wal-Mart.  she didn't show at the meeting today either.
you get tired of negotiating with irresponsible, self-centered actions.
even when they're your own.

my plan tomorrow:
prayer
readings
crunches and stretching
gym
meds & breakfast
give TF her card and her stuffed shells
applications
apartment hunting
tidy my space
start consolidating my things (optional)
prepare to shoot computer tech scene for Mechanical Jesus commercial
pay bills

is that enough?  it's what is on my list.

i still have to set a meet with the author from Campbell.  i still need to call the Daily Grind about a book signing.
but i have to take the steps i am capable of taking. deliberation is important.
it was a good meeting.
i have food in the freezer.
i am grateful to Jehovah for my life and all that is within it.
i am still growing.

that's enough for the night.  time to push.