...another way of saying i didn't do much of what i'd planned to do today. it is cold. i knew it would be, and likely it's no colder than any other winter, but it is cold and i'm not digging it very much. not to mention i did not sleep at all last night. tossed, turned and finally went into the living room with my blanket and watched the television and let it watch me during a few nods, and was pretty out of it this morning. i laid down after i got Syd out the door, but i still couldn't go under. finally said my prayers, got up and had breakfast and took meds, and i sort of lazed about. finally i got my quarter-flyers done for the nomination requests that i'm going to approach the public with, and i got an application filled out that i will mail tomorrow on my way to my meeting. so it hasn't been a completely unproductive day, but enough so that i know i have to get my ass in gear tomorrow.
i think a lot of this is just the adjustment i'm going to have to take on. R did text this morning, phone back on and running, but i didn't respond. i will answer if she calls, but i'm not feeling sending kites into the wind, just to have crumbs for contact. i have work to do, and i have gym stuff to tend to, and i'm going to do that. and if R wants to be in my life, she will. and if she doesn't, I want to be in my life. that's the most important thing.
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