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Thursday, January 11, 2018

The Maturing Process pt 2

sometimes, knowledge can be a bad thing.  not that a person shouldn't take time to know things whenever they can, but the saying 'knowledge can be a burden' is not a lie.  to know, to know HOW to know, to discern and see patterns and actions and motivation clearly though one would obscure them from you...it creates a paradox, because you have to be responsible for what you know and also continue on as if you don't know anything.  burdensome.

But before i go any further, updated meals for the 9th and 10th are logged now at the Dining Room, and the link will take you there.  thanks for your patience.

First, this company is less than a month old in this area.  whatever it was before has changed recently.  many of its employees have come from the Fairfield transportation system that took DD individuals to their functions.  so a company moved into this area under the auspices of 'new regulations' that required a company like theirs do the things they were already set up to do on behalf of the community, and thus PCS Trumbull county was born.  and what it sounds so much like to me is the rash of treatment centers that have opened in the lee of the 'opiod epidemic'.

anyway, there is a mad rush to fill the positions, and there is a mad rush to get people out on the roads.  but i am not trained, at all.  i am learning, and am doing well enough, i suppose.  but i'm not trained. never did this work before, and that is known.  so there really are no realistic expectations of me. and a month into a new company, there aren't many expectations for anyone that are real, other than competency.  but we're having an in-service thursday.  concerning things that the heads of the company in the city say are being done wrong.  and there is a lot of bickering and infighting, because people have a hard time dealing with being told they're doing wrong when they don't know what they're doing at all.

but those are sort of 'asides'.

i have been enjoying myself.  learning the people on the vehicle, including my driver.  the most complicated thing so far is learning the straps to hold a wheelchair in place on the bus.  we're out for about 3 hours, down for about 3, 4 hours, then out for about 3 hours and do it again the next day.  i am learning that i often have to help someone onto the bus, that i need to be on the sidewalk to help a person, that everyone doesn't want help, or want you in their space.  just like anyone else. 

i have learned the company is set up to fail, that the rush is rife with penalties for doing things wrong, that even the drivers, many of them experienced from the previous company, are doing most things wrong, that there are fines, there are lost raises and perhaps even withheld monies from the workers for these things not being done correctly.

and i can't have that.  regardless of how much i could enjoy this job, i'm doing it to get paid.  bottom line. 

there's more.  but the thing is, as in the title, i just want things to be done correctly.  if they're not, i want to get paid for doing the job i was hired to do, regardless of whether i've been trained to do it or not.  because i can't train myself to do a job that is under state guidelines.  i can only follow principles of treating someone human as a human and hope that's good enough for now.

i got up in a rush yesterday, realizing that 445 is not enough time to get a day started.  i had no breakfast before i left, and that's not good for me.  i did pray, did read out of Proverbs, did get to work on time.  i ate a late breakfast, had no lunch, finished my work day okay and got home to warm up leftovers from yesterday and chill a bit. 

i talked to Yvette yesterday.  she's constantly depressed.  i have to get to see her, and can since we don't work weekends.  but there's so much sickness right now, so many people in my life hurting.  it's very depressing. 

i don't know we're off monday.  if we are, i don't know if we get paid for it.  i only know i'm grateful to Jehovah for the job, regardless of the intent of the people who hired me.  and i'm going to start looking to see what else is out there soon enough. 


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