the Earl penny

...there was a gentleman named Earl D who used to come to the meetings.  he was a strange dude, who got stranger as the years went by.  not a bad dude, just strange.  i'd met him first when i came back from Columbus.  his attitude at that first meeting sort of dictated how i'd deal with him for the rest of our days in proximity to each other.  he immediately spoke out the side of his neck (in an off-hand way) when i complimented him on a shirt he was wearing, in that it was a similar pattern to a shirt i had on.  then i noticed, as time went on, he didn't speak very much about himself, not about his past or his current personal life.  he would just reiterate the same things, like a radio that played one song.  i try not to be hypocritical.  he wasn't well liked by me, but he wasn't a pain in the ass above and beyond either. 

over the years i'd learned that he'd had a career in the NFL, that he was now pretty close to destitute, trying to raise a young daughter by himself.  he went from driving an SUV to needing rides to meetings. but he would always come.  he would always speak.  he would always offer suggestions, best as he could.  and he would always put a penny in the basket, at the end.  it was what he had, so it was what he gave. 

when he died, i evaluated our dealings with each other.  i felt sad, because i knew we hadn't been 'friends', and now we never would be.  but i hold the fact of him always putting a penny in the basket close to my heart.  Jesus spoke about the woman who put the last of her coins, which were of little value, in the offering at the temple.  to give of all one has, there is such a power in that kind of giving.  it is beyond the comprehension of most humans today.  but i've been at meetings where we've gotten food stamps in the basket.  and we used them, yes we did. 

today was a good day.  it wasn't spectacular.  i didn't get my car fixed.  i did better with getting a wheelchair strapped in on the bus.  i ate as well as being on the move during my hiatus time from work allowed me to, i saw my parents, i have washed my coat and some things i may need to pack for Friday's sojourn, and i have a roast in the crock pot ready to roll tomorrow.  i feel blessed, feel like i'm doing okay, doing good work, and moving forward. 

but, so that i don't forget, i put a penny on this page to remind me of Earl Douthit, an acquaintance, a fellow recovering addict who no longer has to worry about relapsing, a guy who carried the message as long and as far as he was supposed to.  i remind myself to give of all i have when it's all i have to give, because that's the only way you can be sure you gave from your heart. 

thank you, Father, for a good day.