new journey (day one, though not a continuous entry)

these random pictures have nothing to do with what's going on with me at this moment.  i dare say, i feel pretty good.  i didn't expect that i would, but i do.  and i'm not going to look that horse in its gifted mouth either.  it was not a bad day, and while it had its elements of stupidity, it also had more than enough rewards to send me back to CCA for day two tomorrow.

so, i woke up, and i was groggy as fuck.  another sleepless night for the most part.  i don't know exactly what the issue is.  i go upstairs, i lay down, i get on the computer.  its early when i take my ass up the stairs, and it's midnight before i'm even heading toward heading toward sleep.  but it's cost me a week at the gym, and it's mostly, i believe, my own isms, my issues with my parents outside of my control, my stuff, my bullshit.  why was i early upstairs yesterday?  as i said, because i was still salty from the 'chicken parm incident'.  no big deal.  you pay for what you get, you own what you pay for, and sooner or later everything you own comes home to you.  Stephen King quote, my favorite.

but i got up.  said my prayers, read my books, came downstairs and made mom coffee.  took a shower, shaved.  put on my own coffee.  got my ass moving in a good direction.  had an omelet and a piece of toast for breakfast.  made sure mom was okay.  laid back down for a bit.  got dressed after lotioning.  and eventually made my way south to CCA.

so, first the stupidity.  myself and another girl were there to do paperwork.  they didn't say anything to her at all about a start day today.  she had an engagement that she would have changed had she been informed, but now she's starting next week.  second, they told me last week that i'd be working 10am to 6pm.  today, they informed me that i'd be working 4pm to midnight.  okay, not the worst thing. kinda used to that, from the Amazon thing.  but, they also did not heed that i said i could not work Wednesdays.  and i stuck to that one.  you can't give on everything right off the bat.  i also have to call SS to find out about medicare since CCA is offering medical and prescription coverage.  at no cost to me.  and to see how long before they cut my funds.  third thing.  they didn't tell me we got no breaks, we got no lunch break.  we do get a lunch break, when the inmates go to lunch.  or dinner, or breakfast or whatever.  some pre-knowledge of that, a 'pack a lunch, you're gonna need it', would have been a joy.  but no such luck.  so today, aside from that omelet, i ate a pack of cheese peanut butter crackers i  got from my trainer, and it wasn't until a quarter to seven this evening that i actually ate something else.

the work?  not bad, i suppose.  you check to make sure everyone is where they're supposed to be.  you distribute meds, you do pat downs, you search rooms, you confiscate contraband, you do body counts.  you are a monitor in a facility of people who have more dire consequences hanging over their heads.  you do the job, i guess. no one seems extremely put out.  i can do this, i'm pretty sure.  i see no reason why i shouldn't be able to.  the 4 to midnight isn't bad.  i got out of it for tomorrow, and i plan to go to the drive-in with Rachel, if she's available.  i'm tired now, feet a little sore, but it could be a ton worse.  no heavy lifting, no breaking my back.  i can live with that.

so, that's the deal.  10 to 6 tomorrow, 4 to midnight starting saturday.  counseling tomorrow.  another full day.  hopefully, a trip to the outside movies with Rachel. life could be much worse, and i am so grateful to my Father that i can say that with honesty.