Re-Conditioning

this has been a pretty brutal season now coming to an end.  it has been so rough, physically and emotionally, that daylight savings barely registered as a change on the perception level.  from the temperature changes/mood swings to the flash snows, from the changes in my living and work travel arrangements to the madness at work to Da Boss leaving, it has been something that i have not been able to get a grip on.  and yet, i move forward.  and that is the truth of what i need to focus on.  Life does that, you know.  life does not require my permission to switch up completely.  that's why being able to be responsive is so important.  you can plan your plan to your heart's content, but only the fool attempts to plan the results.  you can plan FOR a particular outcome that you wish, but you have to be ready to accept that it doesn't happen, and to move on otherwise.  that's just reality.

yesterday was a cool enough day.  no serious drama, a few changes but nothing out of the realm of reality.  woke and prayed and meditated and medicated, same as this morning.  got Josh, went to work.  skipped breakfast.  did my morning route, got to my parent's house, saw my sister Lori and her daughter and her daughter's  newborns.  stayed away due to this lingering cold i've got, but i did see them.  took a brief nap, talked to my mom and helped my dad with something he's working on.  went to Subway, got half a sub and a cup of soup, did my afternoon run and came home.  had chicken parm with pasta and leftover spicy cabbage for dinner.  took gout and neuropathy meds as i had a flare starting and tried to nip it in the bud.  read some scripture with dinner, good to do as often as i can.  spiritual food is more necessary at this time.  i talked to Rachel earlier in the day, talked to Lonnie.  made a call to Keith, but of course didn't reach him.  trying to find the willingness to start reaching out again, as i know there are no real benefits to feeling this isolation, though i did not necessarily provoke it.  but justified or not, it doesn't make it healthy or make it feel good.  so i'm looking at it differently, however slightly.

had my shower this morning.  got to set the mouse traps this evening.  about to lotion and dress and get ready to roll.  thank you, Father, for reconditioning my heart in Your own time, in Your own way.