...no suicidal notions here. just remarking that i have run late in my journaling today, and am trying to get done so i can put my ass to sleep.
it was a full day, not really busy but just back to back stuff. i got up with my prayer and i got Syd out the door with a note for her dentist appointment. i had coffee, breakfast, meds and a bath. i went to have coffee with TP who will be leaving this weekend, i believe. from there I went to the meeting, set up and went to get donuts for the meeting. the lead was good, a gentleman i've known since i got clean and who i'd never heard his story before. when the meeting was done i locked everything up and got gone, heading to Warren to meet Syd and Jo there for her dentist appointment. got the dentist out of the way, came home long enough to put something small in my face and head back out to the HH training class. came in from that at 6, had dinner, and laid down which is where i am now. i didn't write out a menu beforehand because i didn't know how the eating would go. i am going to chart it now because i have to stay honest and disciplined.
breakfast was scrambled eggs and a piece of toast.
lunch was spread out. before the meeting, a chicken breast and leg. after meeting, chicken rings from BK. after dentist, half a chicken sandwich on one slice of bread. at training class, two small bags of Wise popcorn (14 g carbs total). dinner, a pork chop and green beans and mushrooms.
wednesday is my day off from the gym.
my observations for today:
TP is steeped in her own misery and she may be a person who is only happy when she's bitching. i never noticed it until she kinda went south at the ending of last year, but she complains about the same thing every day. i hate that i've gotten to the point of sort of tuning her out, but i have.
R is going to drive me crazy, but its a voluntary ride for me. she was irked because i said 'when you come to finish the commercial i'll give you a print of the book'. she said i've been saying things 'like that' and she's been trying to show in her tone that it's bothering her. i have no idea what she's talking about, but i am at the moment very hesitant to call her because it seems all i can do is make things worse. not backing away, just leaving it alone for the night. but the book is done, and aside from editing and a need for a poem perhaps, i could put it up for sale tomorrow. but i told her i wanted her to read it first. i know a lot of this is just the residuals, as always. at times, you just have to be the person to take the shot so that the person you love can get it out of their system.
i am tired, but i had a cup of coffee at training and may not easily fall asleep.
but i'm going to try. and i thank my God, Jehovah, for a productive and progressive day.
gym tomorrow morning. treadmill.
don't know meals yet
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