no, it's not the car, and i am blessed and happy with the decision to purchase this car. it is a further step along the line of becoming, to take on a responsibility, for a person who was once accurately labeled 'consistently inconsiderate', and that by a friend.
the photo is one i allowed to be taken. i'm not at my best. i didn't shower and shave to go to this dealership. i didn't present myself at my 'best'. i got up and got into the day after prayer and reading and medications, after turning my will and my life and my path over to the God of my understanding, Jehovah. i took a 'me' day because it was what i was led to do, and i got done what i was led to get done. the people treated me like an adult because I AM AN ADULT, and that's the whole deal. i've grown up.
i am 51 years old now. my daughter is 20, my son will be 30 soon. i have a grandson who will be one in about 14 days. i work a steady job of responsibility for the care of developmentally disabled persons who need care, and i provide trust and stability their loved ones and guardians can count on. i have bank accounts, i have savings and i am not rich, nor will i ever likely be. i've been married and divorced, i have had women and now live alone. i take care of parents i was once very neglectful of. today i'll be taking my father money for staying in his property.
i am blessed. coffee is now brewing automatically in my kitchen. i've just woke up to start this day. i'm about to pray, to get things going, because nothing happens without turning it over to God. and that's the best thing. when i stopped 'trying' to grow up, it happened.
thank you, Jehovah, for my life.
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