Instant Fall

longer times between now, i know.  i'm not sure why.  seems as if the days are kind of blending together, not particularly spectacular, but a blur.  one to the next, mostly just trying to unravel the mysteries of the stupidities handed to me to deal with, including from my own mind.  i can say, by God's grace, I've dealt with them so far, and am grateful for that fact.

for the past 2 weeks, i've been in pain.  apparently sciatica, and have been to an ER and an urgent care. i am in possession of a churning gut, and cannot urinate without the feeling of needing to defecate, and nothing is coming but liquid.  stomach virus?  probably.

the weather has changed.  fall instantly came from summer once again.  no gradual bleeding away of the daylight and the heat.  just a hot day, cold nights, and then a cold day and leaves on the ground.  man's folly in God's sight, i suppose.

i get many pictures of my grandson, but it will be at least another month before i can spend any time with him. that's the saddest part of all this.

i have been trying to spend more time with my parents, with my mom anyway.  my dad is always out and running, but my mom is ensconced in the madness of their living arrangement.  i have a lot of work to do, trying to get her to a place where she is with company and cared for, but until then, i have to step up a bit more.  perhaps that's part of the lesson.  can't say for sure.

my friend, the Boss, lost her remaining parent at the end of last month.  i am sad and sorry for her, so many losses in such a short span of time.  i can also sort of relate, though both my parents are alive so i won't be hypocritical with that.

most of my time is alone, again.  since it seems to be my predilection, i am going to stop complaining about it and learn to make the most of it.  i'm working on a book of short stories and poems, to be released hopefully before year's end.  i'm also going to work on a friend's book, which should have some commercial value in a different consumer range and could help me get my brand out there.  we'll see.  one step at a time.

no counseling this week.  thanks, job.

but i'm still grateful.  the route, despite all the changes and partial information, is working.  and i won't be there tomorrow, which is no small blessing in itself.  i'm okay for this moment, and this moment is all we really have, right?

thank you, Father, for my life and my mind today.